Hyrocrite

Every man alone is sincere. At the entrance of a second person, hypocrisy begins. We parry and fend the approach of our fellow-man by compliments, by gossip, by amusements, by affairs. We cover up our thought from him under a hundred folds.
~Ralph Waldo Emerson, "Friendship" Essays, 1841

Hypocrite, munafik, berpura-pura.. carry the same meaning. Life can never be let alone from hypocrisy for everyday we are dealing with people and people tends to be hypocrites. And when it comes to PEOPLE too, macam-macam kerenah la pulak. Ada masa we can be truthful to ourself but me, most of the time I'm struggling with my personal principal and friends. Ada masa rasa macam dah nak BURST sangat.. but no where to turn to. Why.. sebab nak menjaga hati orang lain...

Dulu masa kat Malaysia, berperang dengan diri sendri and family. Kat sini pulak among kawan-kawan. Ye la, actually we are all here for one reason only.. mencari rezeki.. for whom.. kalau bukan keluarga, anak-anak dan diri sendiri. KAWAN.. it comes into picture as a BONUS. Dah duduk merantau macam ni, keluarga pulak jauh.. so sapa lagi la kita nak mengadu kalau bukan KAWAN. But be hold.. KAWAN jugak boleh merosakkan kita, KAWAN jugak boleh tambah sakit pening kepala kita.. tapi kalau tak ada kawan, problem jugak kan.

Some people says, "lantak p la orang nak kata ape pun, as long kita yakin kita tak buat salah".. well, won't you rather agree with me if I say that, cakap senang la.. bila nak buat.. haaa.. baru tau.. In this case, sangat la benarnya.. cakap memang senang, tapi bila nak buat.. bukan la semudah yang dikata. Tapi mulai hari ini, Ibu bertekad, biarla Ibu bersendiri.. sebab.. kalau itu yang terbaik.. so be it. Then kalau ada orang nak kata Ibu ni KERA SUMBANG or SOMBONG.. terpulang la.. kalau dah terlalu glamer pun susah jugak kan. Takut nanti tak terlayan pulak kehendak and kerenah semua orang.

Lagi pun bila dah terlalu kerap dikelilingi MANUSIA, ada masa kita tak mampu untuk menjadi diri kita sendiri. Hati dan perasaan orang lain pun kena jaga jugak.. tambahan pulak kalau kita ni ramai kawan yang under category SENSITIVE !!!..

But nevertheless.. please take into consideration.. TRUTHFUL is always the best policy... well in this matter, Ibu berjanji untuk be truthful to myself  and my family more than ever.. yang lain tolak tepi dulu.. and at the same time I hope the end-result.. I'll be happier with myself more than I ever be. Last but not least.. no more HYPOCRISY.